Cat toys

Izabelle with her favourite toy

Izabelle with her favourite toy

This morning I woke up to the sound of Penny playing. Like all silly kitty-parents, we fall for temptation and buy the odd cat toy for the motley crew at home. It sounded as if Penny was having a really good time, so I craned my head around the old boy (no, not the husband, D’Ar – the old Somali! ), who promptly grumbled at me – Stay Put. Too Early To Get Up. Cuddle Ration Not FulFilled Yet! Penny chose that moment to catapult across the floor, acrobatically land on one hindleg and proceed to throw something through the air with her front paw – and promptly chasing after it. My first thought was that the Hill’s Prescription Diet j/d obviously was doing her arthritis wonders as it has been a while since she was last this agile. The next was curiosity to see what super toy she had found, and a fleeting thought that I should buy a new one of those. Well, probably to no-one’s surprise the super toy that she was playing with was – a really big elastic band…..

We tend to keep the elastic bands out of reach of small kittens, but this one was one of the ones that the mail comes wrapped in, so quite a sturdy specimen that hopefully wouldn’t get swallowed and disappear into the insides of a cat and cause havoc.  Penny was quite pleased with this one. Was Rude! She said… Needed To Be Told Off. Quickly! Quite A Lively Little Escape Artist! She followed up with a slightly bemused expression on her face.

After many, many years of buying cat toys I have come to the conclusion that – at least for my cats – it really is quite simple. A good ‘cigar’ or other big toy stuffed with catnip is extremely popular – for 3 days. Then it needs to be taken away for a month before being given again – for 3 days. Ping pong balls are brilliant – if you can put up with the noise of them on wooden floors or tiles. If you want to participate, feather dusters or sticks with long, dangly boas on their end are great. And the absolute winners are 3: Pipe cleaners twisted into funny shapes (they move like greased lightning when the cats hit them), big elastic bands (SO Funny To Put A Paw On Them, Bite Into Them, Pull And Have Them Go Snap And Hit The Paw, the mittens earnestly assure me) and finally – the little white circle that keeps a stack of blank CD’s in their place (!) (I know – really, really weird…).

The last one we discovered by accident. One of the cats followed the usual principles of clean desk policy – found it on the table and promptly hit it so it fell on the floor. At this stage it was discovered by the mittens – and oh, dear…. I have never seen two kittens play so hard…Being tough parents we tend to only give them one toy at a time – so much more fun to see them all follow each other around to see if they can snatch it away..

So – moral of the story – cat toys are really mostly for humans…. At least according to my cats. Really, Mum, they say with a slightly pitying expression on their face when I present them with a new fancy toy, You Are Just SO Predictable – Will Buy Anything Shiny. And off they go to play with the pipe cleaners…

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